June 30, 2009
Posted: June 30th, 2009 01:00 PM ET

From
Jenny Sanford did not stand beside her husband when he publicly admitted to having an affair.
Jenny Sanford did not stand beside her husband when he publicly admitted to having an affair.

Editor's note: Gloria Borger is a senior political analyst for CNN, appearing regularly on CNN's "The Situation Room," "Campbell Brown," "AC360°" and "State of the Union With John King," as well as special event coverage.

WASHINGTON (CNN) - After years of watching those wives stand (sadly) by their men, there was something refreshing - and real - about Jenny Sanford's decision to be far, far away from the governor's apology tour.

After all, what would she have done when he rambled on and on about his love of his "adventure trips" on the Appalachian Trail when, it turns out, he wasn't hiking?

And would she have had to sweetly smile as her husband paid homage to her as a terrific "campaign manager"?

And what affect would she have had to adopt when the governor spoke about "that whole sparking thing" - his peculiar way of describing how an e-mail relationship developed into something else?

The accepted political guidelines for jilted wives (see: wives, jilted) have always decreed that the wounded ones be seen, but stay silent. They are the suffering partners willing to literally remain in the picture out of political necessity. Their very presence helps to suggest that this love is worth saving, because this man is so special - to all of us.

Well, forget it.

Full story

Filed under: Jenny Sanford • Mark Sanford


DEEP BRAIN DIARY» Sanford Story Gets Even Skeezier!   June 30th, 2009 2:54 pm ET

[...] Polls show a majority of Americans say he should resign.  Fellow conservatives want him to quit.   The state attorney general is gonna review his travel records.  And his wronged wife is setting new standards for the jilted political spouse. [...]

Paul from Kissimmee   June 30th, 2009 2:48 pm ET

I'm glad she didn't put herself through that too. If she stays with him, I'd be surprised. I don't see how she would rest if he's out of town or running late from work. I've seen people out of the public spotlight try to work it out, and they never seem to get past that. Seeing your spouse on the news about cheating on you has to make it almost impossible.

Dennis   June 30th, 2009 2:47 pm ET

Hillary could learn something from Jenny Sanford. Oh wait, the Clintons don't have a marriage, it's a political arrangement.

Kwesoe   June 30th, 2009 2:45 pm ET

Commandment # 10
"You shall not covet your neighbor's house, or his wife, or his land, or his manservant or his maidservants, his ox or donkey or anything that belongs to your neighbor."

The neighbor, as you can see is a man and all the properties of the man are listed in the order of their significance. This is the fundamentalist religious doctrine that drives people like Mark Stanford. Jenny needs to leave him and demonstrate that she is not his property who sits around waiting to please him.

Kate   June 30th, 2009 2:36 pm ET

Jenny Sanford should be a model for other wives of exposed philandering politicians. She is not naive for wanting to try to salvage the marriage: there are four children involved and these situations are complicated. Divorce is not the right option for everyone. But by forcing her husband to stand alone in the public eye, she has retained her dignity.

Tee   June 30th, 2009 2:34 pm ET

Way to stand UP for yourself!! You deserve better.......no one should have to stand beside a cheating mate.....THANKS for being REAL!!

KLK   June 30th, 2009 2:20 pm ET

I really like this lady. I admire the way she's presented and carried herself throughout this whole ordeal. She is much better off without that loser husband of hers.

JR   June 30th, 2009 2:19 pm ET

She missed the perfect opportunity to "Spit in his eye" on national TV.

rachel   June 30th, 2009 2:18 pm ET

Yeah I will wait to see the divorce papers, to see if she actually leaves him. But really folks who are we to tell folks to leave their husbands if they want to stay. If the wife chooses to stay thats her perogative. If she chooses to leave that's her perogative.

RUSH NEXT   June 30th, 2009 2:17 pm ET

Jenny 4 Govenor...she will do a better job and definately dont sleep around like a dog,.

Kaye   June 30th, 2009 2:15 pm ET

I'm proud to see her put her children first, as it should be. He and he alone screwed up. He can face the 'music' alone.

KJL   June 30th, 2009 2:14 pm ET

Mrs. Sanford is kidding herself if she thinks her marriage can be salvaged. She's a smart, attractive woman but her husband lied and cheated. Does she think his morals will improve when she's older? Or if she becomes ill? Or when the children have all left? Or when his political career is over?

Sanford has shown that bible passages are his weapon of choice in proving that whatever he does is fine. He's too sactimonious to change.

Anne   June 30th, 2009 2:10 pm ET

But... She's still with him

yes they're "seperated" but if you're man has to ask your permission to go see the other gal he's doing the horizontal tango with- and i don't care what reason he went to see her for, breaking it off or otherwise, it's time to let him go...

Yes 20 years of marraige... nothing is easy... we all are human and make mistakes... we all should be forgiven...bla bla bla...

This guy isn't worth anyone's time- including the people of SC and his wife... She's attractive, successful, and she should spend her time on something other than trying to fix a relationship with someone who prefers to listen to himself drone on and on and then cruise off to see his latin lover...

kick him out jenny... like now

Shirley In California Now On The Fence Re Obama   June 30th, 2009 2:09 pm ET

Paint her up ALL you want CNN – she is NOT a classy woman. Why would any woman with any class give statements to the press especially considering she has children? Oh yes, I forgot – you allow people to call Michelle Obama classless but not your blue eyed Jenny. She exhibits anything but class. As a matter of fact I think more of her husband than I do her. Personally, if I look for strength in a woman it would not be from her. What strength?

I'm sure as with all my other emails calling Jenny Sanford classless this won't get through either but that won't stop me from saying it.

GOP = 21st century dodo   June 30th, 2009 2:08 pm ET

"Don't care.

When its revealed that Sanford and his wife are in some way responsible for enslaving our economy with Cap and Tax, then I'll care.

Until then, all I care about is stopping Communist Chancellor Obama."

This is the equivalent of a 5 year old plugging his ears and yelling as loud as he can when he hears something he doesn't like.

Jeff, TX   June 30th, 2009 2:02 pm ET

This lady is no wallflower. Stay tuned. She'll be a force if she wants to.

Marianne Hinckley   June 30th, 2009 1:58 pm ET

Mrs Sanford will survive either with or without her husband, and she will rear fine young sons. Her husband will not survive so well, as men just can't cope without a woman around. Now that the awfulness of the affair has been exposed to sunshine and fresh air, the governor can never go back there as he realizes what a fool he has been. Nothing gained, much lost. The governor should resign to protect his family regardless of politics. The "lover" be hanged...she knew she was messing with a married man.

JD   June 30th, 2009 1:55 pm ET

Bravo Mrs. Sanford! I get so frustrated seeing these often times brilliant wives of disgraced politicians "standing by their man". It's refreshing to see a woman refuse to participate in that political theater.

Hooray for Jenny   June 30th, 2009 1:54 pm ET

If more spouses would speak the truth, many of thes pols – Clinton-Edwards-Ted Kennedy et al we could toos some of these over sexed lying cheating beauracrats out of office

Zero.   June 30th, 2009 1:54 pm ET

The true balance of power.

sms29s   June 30th, 2009 1:52 pm ET

She is blameless in this debacle. Her public personna has been spotless.

kgeukes   June 30th, 2009 1:51 pm ET

She should take him for everything he has...no, wait a minute ....he married the money!!! The only thing he should get is the clothes on his back!!!! Oh and his girlfriend!!!!

FH in SC   June 30th, 2009 1:49 pm ET

What a GREAT, dignified lady! She's really set the bar high, for other
jilted wives to follow! Her words of, "I'll be fine if my marriage works, or if it does not work...." Very disarming words there. Strong resilient, courageous is how I see her. She's become the model for every married woman. A heroine to emulate.

jaye   June 30th, 2009 1:47 pm ET

These women have no shame – they belittle women all over the world.

J.P.   June 30th, 2009 1:47 pm ET

Don't care.

When its revealed that Sanford and his wife are in some way responsible for enslaving our economy with Cap and Tax, then I'll care.

Until then, all I care about is stopping Communist Chancellor Obama.

Stay Active   June 30th, 2009 1:46 pm ET

She should leave him. This is the time he got caught. How about the other times he did not get caught. I feel sorry for her. As for him...who cares. He is a real creep!!!

Jim Dokes   June 30th, 2009 1:44 pm ET

Finally, a woman who doesn't accept the nonsense of "standing by her man" when her man is nothing than a lying adulterer. Good for her!

matilda Johnson   June 30th, 2009 1:36 pm ET

Good for her!

Babs   June 30th, 2009 1:36 pm ET

She's a class act he is classless. Why can't men in politics keep it in their pants? Truly discusting, and people keep electing these morons.

demwit   June 30th, 2009 1:34 pm ET

CNN's best team in politics is all over this story. You go guys.., keep trashing the republicans. That whole concept of smaller government just doesn't cut it anymore in Obama's progressive America!!

Melissa   June 30th, 2009 1:33 pm ET

Finally, a politicians wife with a brain.

Lisa   June 30th, 2009 1:29 pm ET

I especially loved her comment about his career not being her concern. Good for her!!

lynn in NM   June 30th, 2009 1:28 pm ET

Mrs. Sanford has class, and a brain in her head. She also uses that brain.

Jamie from Riverside   June 30th, 2009 1:28 pm ET

You go girl! I love Jenny Sanford.

Party Crasher   June 30th, 2009 1:24 pm ET

Twenty dollars of my stimulus check says that she stays with him. For the kids, for the marriage, or because he said that he wants to change. He will still be going south of the boarder when he can or meeting Maria when ever she come north. Where is Jenny got to go, nobody else wants a woman with four kids.

Oh GIve Me A Break   June 30th, 2009 1:24 pm ET

Well said Gloria! Let the jump-off from South America stand by his side, since he was so gung-ho to disappear just to see her. Most of these Bozo's marry the wives they have for political gain not caring that she has feelings too. It makes THEM look good. But if he doesn't have enough respect for her or his kids, how can you expect him to respect the electorate of South Carolina? Hello? I hope she divorces his behind and take him to the the cleaners. See if the South American woman will want him then.

d1120   June 30th, 2009 1:23 pm ET

Take his money.........and RUN !

Tania   June 30th, 2009 1:22 pm ET

Brava! Our thoughts and prayers are with her and her children. As for him, let him dig himself out, if he can. Creep.

barbara campbell   June 30th, 2009 1:21 pm ET

The Republicans are already grooming Ms. Sanford for political office, now that she's achieved national fame. No credentials needed of course.

a little sad   June 30th, 2009 1:20 pm ET

"As she told the AP, "It's one thing to forgive adultery; it's another thing to condone it." So he went anyway, as Jenny Sanford tells us. She has no idea whether he has ended the affair, as he had promised. "I believe he has," she said. "But he was down there for five days. I saw him yesterday, and he is not staying here."

***************************

It's kind of awkward to throw your husband out of your residence when your residence is the governor's mansion and your husband is the governor.

Jenny For Gov   June 30th, 2009 1:19 pm ET

Kudos to Jenny for NOT STANDING BY MARIA'S MAN, but standing by the Sanford boys.

Hey Jenny, why don't you run for office, you're the real gem in this whole fiasco.

cheryl of san diego   June 30th, 2009 1:17 pm ET

Hooray to Jenny (for not standing beside this cheating husband). This man is not trustworthy enough and not worth saving as a "husband" and "governor of South Carolina."

He is equally embarrassing as a man and as a public official. His apologies are not accepted.

KG, Twin Cities   June 30th, 2009 1:16 pm ET

He was obvioulsy intimidated by and jealous of his wife's strength and character. Best wishes for Mrs. Sanford.

John H.   June 30th, 2009 1:15 pm ET

Jenny Sanford would probably make a better Governor than Mark. At least she seems intelligent and honest, which is a lot more than one can say for the current Governor.

Dutch/Bad Newz, VA   June 30th, 2009 1:13 pm ET

The stand by your man political stunt won't fly anymore. Especially when the spouse affected will become the laughing stock of the political spectrum. Good job Jenny not to stand next to that scumbag of a husband of yours. Tell him he needs to practice what he preaches.

The Other Man   June 30th, 2009 1:13 pm ET

You go Jenny!

Shari, NY   June 30th, 2009 1:11 pm ET

Hats off to Jenny who is no hypocrite! The only one who comes close to her is Dina Matos-McGreevey, the wife of a NJ governor who was gayer than Paris. Mrs. McGreevey stood by her hubby for about a day because she felt sorry this lifelong closeted soul, but she then dragged him to court accusing him of marrying her under false pretenses. Much mud came out of it but in the end Dina got a decent settlement. Kudos to strong women!

Sherry in NJ   June 30th, 2009 1:07 pm ET

She is acting this way because she doesn't have political aspirations like many of the women do (ie., Hillary Clinton). She is good and right, her main concern is raising her boys and being a good person.

Once You Vote Black: PUMA, Sanford, Operation Chaos.   June 30th, 2009 1:04 pm ET

Its probably that sort of hard hartedness that drove him into cheating in the first place. Look a womens role in a family melt down is passive so it looks like the guy is the dog because he actually has to take the actions that brings the problem to the public, but there is nothing to say that he was the only problem with the relationship. William Covey says it takes two to screw up a marrage. Just a thought.

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